there is about a 2-3mm gap between the maxle "collar" and the lower leg
The gap is normal. If you look at the axle youll see it has a raised section which the RH leg sits on, the lip on the edge of this raised section is what tightens the hub up against the LH leg, not the 'collar'. This allows the RH leg to 'float' laterally on the axle until you tighten the lever which expands the cams.
If i pull the fork leg outwards and then tighten the cam, the gap is reduced
You shouldnt do this! The reason the RH leg 'floats' on the axle is to allow the fork to move throught its travel and not get bound up. If your fork naturally has a gap between the end of the axle and the the leg then this is where it wants to sit. If you pull the leg outwards it will bind as it goes through its travel, not good. If you want to be sure do this..
Fit your wheel, insert (greased) axle, spin axle in until snug, compress fork a few times, tighten QR lever firmly.